Where to Sit with Hearing Loss: Why the Right Seat Matters

This article was inspired by my recent conversation with Mike Bolland on the We're Not Stumped podcast. Podcasts allow us to explore ideas together. This article expands on one of those ideas and shares a few additional strategies. If you'd like to hear the full conversation, you'll find links near the end of this article.

If you've ever left a restaurant feeling more tired than hungry, hearing loss may have had something to do with it.

Many people think hearing better starts with better hearing aids. Sometimes, it starts with choosing the right chair.

When my husband and I walk into a restaurant, he doesn't pull out a chair right away. Part of that is because he's a gentleman and wants to pull out my chair for me. But before either of us sits down, he looks at me.

Before I take a seat, I spend a few seconds looking around the room. Sometimes I point to the chair I want. Other times, I simply walk toward it. If we're sitting in a booth, he waits while I move the extra menus to the side where no one will be sitting.

He knows I'm not looking for the most comfortable chair. I'm looking for the place where I'll have the best chance to hear.

Usually, the first thing I notice is the lighting. Can I clearly see everyone's faces? Then I think about my better ear. If we're with friends or family, I try to sit closest to the people I'll talk with the most or whose voices are naturally softer.

It only takes a few seconds, and my husband never rushes me. Sometimes he'll even help slow everyone else down just long enough for me to decide where everyone should sit.

Those few extra seconds often determine whether I spend the meal struggling to follow the conversation or simply enjoying it.

It got me to thinking.

Recently, I had the opportunity to be a guest on Mike Bolland's We're Not Stumped podcast. We spent nearly thirty minutes talking about hearing loss, hearing aids, communication, relationships, advocacy, and everyday life.

At one point I shared how important it is for me to choose where I sit in a restaurant.

I explained that I want to place myself in the best place to hear.

Mike smiled because he does something very similar.

Not because of hearing loss, because of limb loss.

He said,

"I try to get the left side because I'm always bumping people."

We were making the same decision.

Just for different reasons.

That simple exchange stayed with me long after the interview ended.

I've spent years teaching people with hearing loss to think about where they sit and I hadn't really stopped to consider how many other people are doing exactly the same thing.

Choosing Where to Sit with Hearing Loss

Choosing where you sit is one of the easiest communication strategies you can control.

Before you sit down, take a quick look around.

Ask yourself:

• Can I clearly see everyone's face?
• Is there a television or loudspeaker nearby?
• Will glare make speechreading more difficult?
• Can I keep my better ear toward the conversation?
• Am I sitted closest to the people I'll be talking with most?

Those few seconds can make the next hour much easier.

During the podcast, I shared another thought that has guided me for years:

"If I can control as much as I can, that makes it better and makes me feel more confident in that conversation."

That's exactly what choosing your seat does.

Hearing aids cannot move you away from a noisy kitchen.

They cannot improve poor lighting or bring a soft-spoken friend closer to you.

Choosing where you sit often can.

Different Disabilities. Similar Lessons.

One of the things I appreciated most about talking with Mike was that we weren't comparing disabilities. We were learning from one another.

A person with hearing loss may choose a seat to see faces more clearly. Someone with low vision may look for better lighting. A wheelchair user may need more room to maneuver, while a person with a service dog may need extra space nearby. Mike shared that, as a person with limb loss, he often chooses a seat where he has more room at the table.

Many people are balancing more than one disability, so the solution isn't always the same. The goal, however, is.

We're all trying to give ourselves the best opportunity to participate

Listen to the Conversation

One of the things I enjoyed most about being a guest on the We're Not Stumped podcast was the opportunity to learn alongside Mike. Although we experience disability differently, we found ourselves talking about many of the same everyday situations.

If hearing loss is part of your life, I think you'll enjoy our conversation.

If hearing loss isn't part of your story, I think you'll still find value in it. Understanding another person's experience often gives us ideas we can use in our own lives, families, workplaces, and communities.

I also encourage you to explore some of Mike's other interviews. He talks with people living with a variety of disabilities, along with caregivers, advocates, authors, athletes, and professionals. Every guest brings a different perspective, but they all share practical lessons about adapting, communicating, and participating fully in everyday life.